Wednesday 11 February 2015

French Bulldog masturbating... er, no.


The second-most disturbing thing about this video is that anyone would want to film it and upload it to YouTube.

But the first is the woeful misinterpretation of what they're seeing here. This Frenchie paw-job is not an attempt at self-pleasure. Rosko here is not getting his rocks off. This is a brachycephalic dog that cannot lick its own genitals (or anus) and is reduced to doing this in an effort to maintain penis/sheath health and comfort.

There are dozens of similar videos on YouTube. Now some are of dogs that are genuinely masturbating (it is not uncommon and other animals do it too). But the ones of the dogs doing what this dog is doing are all brachycephalic: French Bulldogs, Bulldogs, Pugs. 

It isn't cute or funny. It's criminal. Because we didn't just mess French Bulldogs up so badly that they often struggle to breathe and have such flat faces that they damage their eyes. We didn't just breed them so that 80 per cent of them have deformed spines and can't reproduce naturally (over 80 per cent  are delivered by C-section). We robbed them of this basic survival tool, too.

Bracycephalic dogs can't reach their junk. They cannot clean themselves. Brachy males can't lick their penis to keep it clean. Brachy bitches cannot lick their vulva or reach round to lick their whelps as they are being born. Their owners have to wipe their bums for them. 

French Bulldog registrations have gone through the roof - a more than 2000% increase in the 10 years since 2004 in the UK.

Last year, the Kennel Club removed the Frenchie from the high-profile list. It was way too soon. Sure, there are a handful of breeders who talk a good game about health. And yep, there's a new health scheme for Frenchie breeders in the UK. But it sets the bar so low. Even the "Gold" award doesn't require any test for BOAS. 

It's not the dogs themselves who are wankers. It's those that continue to breed and buy dogs that look like this. 

38 comments:

  1. Recently a teacher at our Primary school bought a puppy and brought it to the school for the young children to meet. Her husband is a vet, so you can imagine my horror when she knowing I breed dogs, opened the back of her car full of pride for me to see a French Bulldog pup sat there. I asked her again, "Your husband is a vet ?" She replied, "Yes" and I asked her, if she understood the problems in this breed, she just shrugged and said, "That's okay, it's just not your thing."
    I actually went back into the school and questioned children being shown such breeds and normalizing this disabling look, without explaining the problems it causes for the dogs, but it fell on deaf ears.
    My children came home from school and told me although the pup was cute, they thought it very weird looking and worried that it's eyes might pop out and they asked me why it snorted so much and made a very funny noise when it tried to bark.

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  2. Glad to see focus shifting from Pug to Frenchie . . . the latest fashion breed now fetching high prices and being bred indiscriminately because the market is strong.

    It's worth noting that brachy is a matter of degrees. Most Bostons can lick themselves with no problems as can other dogs who are somewhat flat faced but don't have their facial anatomy problems confounded by skeletal abnormalities.

    p.s. It's as wrong to use derogatory language toward people who masturbate as it is to vilify gays. "Wankers" is hate speech.

    p.p.s. I tried to post as myself using Google as I normally do. It would not allow me to do so. Jennifer

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    1. Make your mind up Jennifer. You were supportive when Jem referred to Lewis Hamilton as an idiot for buying Bulldogs....
      Get off the PC fence. This issue is bigger than that....I think referring to these utter morons as wankers is pretty tame really.

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    2. Jennifer, saying "Wankers" in the manner it is used in the article above is "hate speech" makes you sound a bit of a twat. Oops ! Have I just vilified woman's genitals.
      By the way I masturbate and I'm not offended by Jemima's comment.

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  3. Yet another reason to pity brachycephalic dogs. It really is a very un-canid-like face for a canid to have, so it makes sense that they would suffer loss of function for it. I think the shortest muzzle of any wild canid belongs to the South American bush dog (Speothos venaticus), which is a bit like a Jack Russel Terrier.

    Highly brachycephalic breeds use their arms for a lot of things. That's probably why boxers box; they don't have the gape anymore to mouth things the way their ancestors used to. It's really quite sad. I don't see why a dog lover would try to change dogs so they don't look or act like dogs anymore.

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  4. My wife has a pug bitch...she runs (literally) with my border terrier and whippet bitches and I can assure you she keeps herself clean. Your welcome to come visit and go for a walk with us anytime you like. It may avoid your need to 'tar everyone with the same brush'...let me know here if you want me to get in touch so you can come for a walk.

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    1. Is it a pug or a puggle? Some pugs (and bulldogs) have incredibly flat faces that really handicap them. Others still have a bit of a muzzle - not much, but better than nothing. If yours is like that, that could explain why it has more function than a completely flattened one.

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    2. BTW - Also, bear in mind that most conditions have what's called variable penetrance, meaning that the same condition can develop to varying degrees. One dog with extreme brachycephaly may be able to adapt better than another, but that doesn't mean they wouldn't both benefit from a more natural, normal, canid-like snout.

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  5. I thought the use of the terms "wankers" was most apt and was rather cleverly applied in this instance, as the term has many varied meanings, including those who need to be part of and to perpetuate the latest trend.

    In my view, it certainly applies to those who breed and buy Frenchies in their "modern" form.

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  6. A dog without a muzzle is handicapped, its deformed end of story. I'm so glad this blog keeps pointing out the nonsense presented about dogs on the Internet. How anyone can think this is masturbation is beyond me, it's not even aroused and believe me it's not difficult to see when they are.

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  7. Yeah I think things have become overdone with the Frenchies.
    Interesting point you raised about the whelp licking.
    Australian Bulldogs, or Australasian Bosdogs as they are now called are attempting to gain recognition by the ANKC (Australian National Kennel Club). The Bosdog's standard mentions natural whelping

    http://www.australianbulldogsociety.com/breed-standard-australasian-bosdogs/

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    1. A very slippery slope if you ask me. They should stick to performance testing and appraisals with open registers if the breed is worth anything to anyone.

      I didn't know there was an Australian bulldog. I'm in NSW at the moment around Scone and have seen some interesting hunting dogs both mastiff types and lurcher type animals traveling around the countryside in cages on the back of trucks. I'm looking forward to finding out more about them.

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    2. Yah I looked up the bosdogs, I think Australian pig dogs would be a better bet. Too much English bulldog going on with those Australian bosdogs for my liking, soft and very brachy not exactly suited to Australian conditions as claimed. Still much more athletic than a bulldog, though. I don't think the addition of the American bulldog does anything either for hardness.

      There are some interesting pig dogs in Australia with some interesting blood introduced including the use of some good lines of boerboel, notably the Ysterberg lines, though longevity is still an issue with some of them.

      I'm not quite sure why people react with horror when you express admiration for these pig dogs. If anything these are very suited to Australian conditions and very functional and suitable for around the farmstead too. I gather pig hunters have a bit of a reputation.

      Oops back to French Bulldogs, they aren't bred nicely at all. This is a breed that for the most cannot even whelp naturally it's so stuffed up.

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  8. Yes there are lots of Pugs and French Bulldogs registered by KC... and a lot from imports. Some of them are funny colours. Any effort the KC is making to improve the health of the breed is surely muddied by these imports, some of which are of dubious background.

    I reported a litter last year to the KC, allegedly of 11!!!! pugs, and all "colour not recognised". Previous litters from this same (alleged) bitch were of 4 and 5, and all accepted colours. There is so much fraud going on with imports, that any health directives are being undermined, and even crossbreeds suffer from health defects - I know someone with a Staff x French Bulldog which has very definite stenotic nares. Those doing crosses and claiming they are "healthier" than the parent breeds also need a boot to their heads!

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  9. I know staffies who can't lick themselves. And the shorter their noses, the more successful they'll be at the shows :(

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  10. Hi guys, you know the british bulldo has been around since the year 1800s, the wrinkles/squashed face is not a new fashion thing, it was to channal blood away frm its eyes during bull baiting?

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    1. I laughed out loud, the good old LOL, when I read this. As far as I can imagine anyway the blood must get caught up in those folds and nearly drown the dog, the folds themselves already almost do that.

      I suppose a more normal head and face wouldn't have this problem, the blood would just run freely down its cheeks even latched onto a bull.

      Dogs used for bull baiting in the 1800's had very different heads to modern bulldogs, wide jaws but not flat faces. They looked more like pitbulls . I don't think there is a place for this breed anymore or for the bizarre mini squashed up modern bulldog which has pug in it.

      But lets assume one got hold of a bull by some miracle, its face is so flat it would suffocate to death anyway before any blood could impair its vision. They're meant to hold on.

      No, all these fanciful ideas are dreamt up by people who are trying to excuse their behaviour for breeding deformed dogs. It is very creative thinking LOL.

      A bulldog anyway these days cant work whether its face is a crinkled bucket full of blood or not, they drop dead from exertion after ten minutes as they over heat and can't breath.

      Is the latter also by design, appear practically if not completely dead so the bull gives up and goes away or something insane?

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    2. Drop dead after ten minutes of exertion?? Mine run for hours in 80-90 degree heat every day with ZERO breathing issues. It’s like you read everything that can go wrong with the breed and assumed every frenchie must have these issues! You should really direct that energy in something useful, cause not only is this not useful, it’s flat out wrong!

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  11. Ha, perhaps your right - http://youtu.be/8Cs-bHoaMbE

    Matt

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  12. Ha, perhaps your right - http://youtu.be/8Cs-bHoaMbE

    Matt

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  13. My favorite dog breed is American bullies but if I have to choose other than american bully I'll go for french bulldogs.

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  14. There is no other dog like a french bull dog, that's why they're so popular. They are companion dogs, so they loved to be loved and are happiest when by your side. Perhaps some people buy them as a fashion accessory however they are so much more than that. They love to clown around, have a will of their own and are one of the family. They are also protective, good at alerting when visitors are at the door. They are generally friendly with other dogs. The list goes on. Yes, so they may have breathing problems and can't lick their bits. We had our dog operated on to correct his breathing, he now runs faster than ever. We regularly clean him, he doesn't ever seem bothered. In fact when we get the cleaning wipes out he lies on his side, purrs in delight as we wipe him over. It's not ideal that they've mutated in this way but that's the reality of the situation, when looked after properly these dogs have very happy lives, bring so much happiness to their owners.

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    1. Thank you for your comment my french bulldog is asleep on my lap breathing beautifully n he is my world he has so much love to give and is extremely healthy I collected him from a loving home who kept the mother as she was their pet.if u look properley!and don't pay pennies! You can find a diamond in the rough x

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  15. Love my frenchie and he loves me. All that matters. Drop the mic.

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    1. Me too!!my boys asleep on my lap breathing clearer than my mums jack russell x

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  16. Hdough8621@gmail.com14 January 2017 at 05:58

    Wow I came across this post by accident what a bunch of nitty bitty's complaining about the French bulldog and all its "deformities" I didn't jump on any bandwagon I have had French bulldogs since one Rescued me 20 years or so.... And since that time I have stayed with breed because of their personalities and yes I love the way they look, I have never had one that had specific French bulldog illness or issues! Now some did get every "dog issues" I am a responsible and proud French Bulldog owner and wouldn't have it any other way and if that makes me a wanker IM Proud of that too!!! This breeds personality is like no other dog they are clowns in fur suits buy and breed responsibly What's the big deal

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    1. Wow last night I saw the most horrific video of a bulldog, a severely brachchephalic breed like the French Bulldog. The poor creature was wheezing and whistling and squeaking as it tried to breath while sitting up, it was also desperately trying to get some sleep but the fear of suffocating to death was keeping it awake. This brought waves of hilarious, repulsively inappropriate laughter from the audience on "Americas Funniest Home Videos".

      Alfonso Ribeiro should be ashamed to be promoting such base ignorance as entertainment, utterly disgusting.

      It's simply appalling that people still just don't get that dogs like this are in terrible distress. Its not making cute little noises! It's battling to breath!!! It's in distress.

      These dogs are not "clowns", what uninformed people like Hdough are not seeing is that it's a dog with chronic disabilities instead. They are finding this funny and endearing. However if they saw a person with the same crippling disabilities, trying to make their way down the street, crooked compressed spines, bent legs and face smashed in they don't laugh. No they don't laugh at all and they don't find it cute or charming either. Then it's not a clown but a tragedy.

      Absolutely buy responsibly, that means get a dog that has a muzzle, that can breath normally, function normally and be all that a dog like any other creature desires to be.

      There are no breeders breeding French bulldogs responsibly. If you know of any why not let us know? Almost all are born with cesarian section because their heads are too big......some are even missing tails, just a hole for shit to dribble out...almost nothing is healthy or normal about the French Bulldog in fact. Have you even looked at your dogs dentition? Would you like a mouth full of misaligned cramped compacted teeth?! Sure? Go stand infront of a speeding bus.

      Your delusional joy is at the expense of a dogs suffering.

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    2. I breed them responsibly so there’s one person. I also am with them 8-10 hours a day 7 days a week. They go to a dog park 5 days a week. I feed them three times a day, and they exercise at least 2-3 hours EVERY DAY! Can you say you’re able to pay the same amount of attention to your animals? 70-80 hours a week? Not one health issue. You’ve probably never owned one, and are basing this off research. Poor taste to talk about what you don’t personally know!

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  17. Whoever wrote this article is an idiot and for all you other idiots that don't have anything nice to say about French Bulldogs your just that.

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  18. I have a French bulldog and he is treated like an absolute prince. He has no back problems and can breathe and function just fine like any other dog breed. You people shouldn’t be so opinionated and scolding towards the breed and their owners

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  19. I have a French bulldog and he is treated like an absolute prince. He has no breathing problems, he sleeps all night without the fear of suffocation, he has no back problems, no problems with his teeth, no problems with going to the toilet and no problems with keeping himself clean. I think that was all the points raised! Some people should really not be so opinionated and scolding towards this breed and their owners. Go and find something else to moan about *yawn*

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  20. My French bulldog 100% does this for self pleasure! I have four and when they “clean” they typically lick each other or scoot. Be careful trying to inform others of what you might be unaware of!! Sounds like you just have a thing against flat faced animals. Why don’t you direct that energy somewhere useful instead?

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  21. You have to laugh at the opinions of this woman. French Bulldogs are companion dogs, my boy has no issues with his breathing and is a beautiful, loving, spoiled pup. Clearly nothing better to do with your life that berate the breed. Every pedigree has issues or potential issues and any responsible owner would know what they are before making the commitment. I love my french bulldog and would not trade him for anything. Small minded Moron!

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  22. Sites like these make me pity you stupid people. Literally go fuck yourself Jemima, YOU are the wanker here.

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  23. Of Course you screen messages on a BS site like this haha Fuck outta here.

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  24. I love all you frenchie owners. Your great. To all you wankers, My frenchie is healthy, runs a muck and jacks off. Xoxo

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  25. I own a Frenchie. He's lovely, his breathing is good, no operation required. I got lucky.

    I'm against breeding which tries to exaggerate brachycephalic traits, but unfortunately, Pandora's box is open. Frenchies in their current state are here. I'd hate to see the breed disappear completely, so a push to reduce brachycephalic issues during breeding would be helpful. We, as humans, are in a position of responsibility, and we need to look after current and future animals.

    The author of this article is very black and white with her reasoning; life is seldom this clear. There are various considerations which go into the purchase of a dog, and decisions are not made in a vacuum.

    The author describes anybody buying this breed of dog a "wanker". I'm sure, internally, your opinions are much stronger than that. I find this way of thinking strange. I wonder if the author was wronged by the owner of a French bulldog in the past?

    Regardless of the cause of the author's hatred/disdain, let's do a little extrapolating. Let's say, I assume the author wishes the sale and purchase of French bulldogs be made illegal. Let's say that law comes into force tomorrow. Would the author accept such dogs being put to sleep? Does the dog deserve this?

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